We've been talking about taking a break from a relationship on TiffTalks at Facebook. The consensus was that if your significant other says, "I need some space" it's a bad sign for the relationship. There is still time to join that discussion, but here's my two cents on it.

Relationships can be difficult and if you’re not careful, they can consume you and distract you from the other important things in your life, so a break might be necessary and beneficial. Sometimes you have to take a step back from something to see it for what it really is. For example, the magnified view of anything is very different than an aerial view. The closer you get to something the more distorted it becomes; so much so that you lose sight of what it is you are looking at. Coincidentally, the same thing happens if you are too far away. When you put too much distance between you and your relationship it becomes insignificant. The further away you get the smaller and smaller it gets, until it disappears.

Find the Balance

It is necessary to strike a balance. You have to remain close enough to experience the benefits of the relationship, but maintain a proper distance so that your view doesn't become distorted. Likewise, you can't be so far away that you can't see the value in it, those things that make it unique and fulfilling.

To find the proper balance you can start by searching yourself. Define what's important to you, and then get close enough to experience the benefits of having a special person in your life. However, if you continue to do the things that you enjoy like maintaining other healthy friendships and hobbies you will create enough distance so you don’t lose sight of the benefits of your current relationship.


If you are the person who has been told by your significant other that they need a break, don’t assume it’s a bad thing. Take this time to re-evaluate what the relationship represents for you. This could actually be a very positive thing for both parties.

Ask yourself the following questions:

What were your top three priorities before you met your significant other? Have they been pushed to the side and replaced with relationship stuff?

How much time do you spend doing things you enjoy?

How much time do you spend fueling your passions?

Once you’ve had some time to answer these questions, spend some time evaluating and setting some new priorities and goals. Finally, keep in mind that the most important person in any relationship is you and the view changes based on where you stand. Where do you stand?

Until next time stay strong, smart and powerful.

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